I DON’T UNDERSTAND

This is straight from the smart person, Google, where she/he tells me that….. “On Jan. 20, the nation’s largest insurer, UnitedHealth Group, reported its full-year 2020 profit of¬†$15.4 billion, including $2.2 billion in profits for the fourth quarter, $3.2 billion in the third quarter and $6.6 billion in the second quarter.” And that’s profit alone during a pandemic. If we were to go to a government run health care system, like in most countries with way better health care, the government would not only have money for health care, it would have money for Social Security and it wouldn’t need to raise debt ceiling limits every four years and it would be cheaper for people because all the money gets pooled into one account instead of it being spread out to, how may companies, Google can you help me out….. ” In the United States, there are currently¬†more than 900 health insurance companies¬†that offer medical coverage.”…. Thanks Google…. That’s probably over 100 billion in profit alone every year. Better coverage, cheaper prices, better health care, save Social Security, maybe lower the over 20 trillion in debt that we owe? maybe…maybe not.

MORE ABOUT ABORTION

The fight for abortion rights is under way and it looks like it will decide future political outcomes. What I don’t understand is why this is an issue in the first place. The Governors of these States that want to abolish abortion have a rationale that doesn’t make sense to me. They are saying that they can force a woman to be a mother but some of these women don’t want to be a mother. So can they force a man to be a dad? I know they can force them to pay child support but that’s not really being a dad, is it. The majority of the reasons for wanting an abortion are, as listed by the National Institute of Health are:

  1. Three-quarters said that having a baby would interfere with work, school or other responsibilities;
  2. two-thirds said they could not afford to have a child;
  3. half said they did not want to be a single parent;
  4. and they were not mature enough to raise a child.

Let’s all assume that proper measures were taken to prevent pregnancy, my son was born even though contraceptives were being used but I was older, making good money, and I actually loved the woman that I would marry while she was (just in case you didn’t know who was the pregnant one) 8 months pregnant, but that’s not always the case. Telling a woman that she has to have a child in a place where there is still no medical insurance for everyone, their child could end up like George Floyd or Dulce Alavez, to be born into poverty, to be born into a community where the school system more resembles a day care and not an educational institute, where systematic racism (pretty much the same as systemic but a little less intentional and more ingrained in how the system works) still exists, is wrong. Why don’t we fix these problems that I listed before we force people to do something that they find morally objectionable, bringing a child into a place that doesn’t care about them but only cares about telling people what to do. Sometimes forcing people to have a child is more like feeding a prison system than it is complimenting humanity. These women know what’s best for them and what they are and aren’t capable of doing and handling and sometimes, at that point in their lives, being a mother isn’t one of them.

As I write this I know that I won’t change the minds of everyone, I might just change the mind of one person, but if it is the right person, a Supreme Court Justice maybe (here, I tremendously over assert that my blog is note worthy and not something people accidentally click on by accident when looking for recipes on how to remove stains from clothes), then it can have the outcome desired. As for the religious beliefs go in this situation, I urge you to keep those thoughts personal and not let them interfere with legal decisions. Not everyone has religious beliefs and the separation of church and state is important, plus God, who I do believe in, can pretty much handle things on his? her? own without our help, I hear that the omnipotent one is pretty powerful. Unless you are telling me God speaks to you, than that’s a conversation you need to have with mental health care workers or the FBI.

It doesn’t escape me that the people making these decisions are mostly male and well to do and they want to make the decisions about women, most that are struggling to survive financially. I don’t think anyone in the Governor’s Office are missing a meal (at least by the way they look) or lack any medical insurance or worry about affording that private school. Abortion is one of the few cases where someone asserts themselves into someone else’s life but it hasn’t anything to do with them. Most cases you have to show the outcome will affect you for you to have a voice, in this case you don’t even have to know the person to have an opinion on what she can do.

And as far as the people that say that I’m glad that my mother didn’t have an abortion, I bet there are a shit load that wish that Jeffery Epstein’s mother had decided to get one. For that matter any person that sexually assaulted a person that their mother had decided to get one.

GYMNASTS SEEK AND GET SATISFACTION

The U.S female gymnastics team made news this week by testifying in front of congress about the delayed response by the FBI in a sexual assault case that would eventually put the team’s doctor, Larry Nassar, in prison for the rest of his life. The gymnasts, and rightfully so, were aghast and dismayed on why it took a year for the FBI, who have garnered the nickname Female Body Inspectors due to their reputation and the t-shirts that are sold at the Washington National Airport, to respond to their complaints and, according to testimony, how callous some of these agents were to their assertions on the matter. Ooof, that nickname is coming back to haunt them. In 2017, one of the female gymnasts, filed a complaint with the USOC and in 2019 with the FBI. The gymnasts would get relief, that’s how the courts put it, I call it AFT justice, or about fucking time justice, on their matter in 2021 and would get a paid settlement of half a billion dollars in a civil suit that took all of two days to agree on. I fully believe they deserve the payout and much more. I’m extremely congratulatory and supportive of their efforts to hold everyone accountable. BUT, this blarticle ( blog+article = blarticle or blah + article = blarticle, depending how you view my piece of work or shit, again depending on your point of view) is not about them, it’s about the little known people that don’t have their resources.

In an immigration detention center run by DHS, Hispanic women would go in for routine gynecological examinations and walk out without a uterus. Hysterectomies were the cure for everything, from heavy periods to the common cold for these ladies. I wonder what did they do with those uteruses? Were they used as skin grafts for U.S. Citizens? Did the doctor tell them to put lotion on prior to the operation? It puts on the lotion or you will not get medical treatment? These hysterectomies have been happening since the early 2000’s and if it wasn’t for the bravery and courage, which I understand mean the same thing but I think it’s necessary to double on it, of an RN who decided to blow the whistle, these women would have never gotten any relief. That detention center no longer houses women but that doctor, I believe, still practices OB/GYN. You see, while the gymnasts, and I appreciate their effort and it makes it easier for these immigrant women to seek relief in court because it puts a case on the docket that they can point to, were outraged and rightfully so, their are other people that have been seeking relief for a long time. The gymnasts case, of a doctor using his position of power to do horrendous acts, and their effort to bring this situation to light, will help these immigrant women who have filed complaints for quite some time about a doctor using his position of power to do horrendous acts. No offense, but it takes an Aly Raisman to get things done because a Catalina Maria Gonzalez-Rivera would just not have the same resources available to her and will eventually get laughed out of court.

So, what did the DHS do with these uteruses? Did they go full blown Cruella and now are wearing pubic hair fur coats? It puts the lotion on…. Was it a decision to give an abortion prior to pregnancy? It puts on the lotion…. Was it that they didn’t want to sexually assault women so they removed the uterus and now are going to town on it, sick fucking bastards….. Whatever the sick and depraved reason, these immigrant women’s fight for justice began a long time ago with no resolution in sight and they are deemed victims but the U.S. Attorney’s office has yet to put a perpetrator in prison. A victim without a perpetrator, I guess is like a woman without a uterus….. I don’t know how to finish that so let me end it their.

For all those sick motherfuckers that take advantage of the weakest most vulnerable people in our society, rest assured… you’re safe….. because no one seems to give a fuck or they give it, when they detach the uterus from the body and then they discard the evidence, uuuugggghhhhh… just vomited in my mouth.

This blarticle is not a referendum on racism. It’s more an insight how justice is delved out. Aly looks like she could be the daughter of 90% of the people in positions of power or authority so there’s innate instinctual feeling to protect her while Catalina Maria doesn’t, so there’s this separation of emotional attachment or even trust in what she says. It’s not racism, it’s human behavior. The people in those positions can’t help it. There has been very few U.S. Attorney’s that were not… white non hispanic and there has never been a Director of the FBI that wasn’t white non hispanic. I am NOT saying in any way that there is any racial animosity components, I am saying that they are acting instinctually and sometimes that doesn’t bode very well for people of different ethnicities. Even the few African American U.S. Attorney Generals had those same instincts, that perceived attacks were sometimes due to a racial component, and if you are listening, it wasn’t true, it’s just your instincts kicking in.

Gaslighting, not sold at your local hardware store.

gaslitten

11 Warning Signs of Gaslighting

Gaslighting is a manipulation tactic used to gain power. And it works too well.

Posted Jan 22, 2017

123rf Stock Photo/Standard License
Source: 123rf Stock Photo/Standard License

Gaslighting is a tactic¬†in which a person or entity, in order to gain more power, makes a victim question their reality. It works much better than you may think. Anyone is susceptible to gaslighting, and it is a common technique of abusers, dictators, narcissists, and cult leaders. It is done slowly, so the victim doesn’t realize how much they’ve been brainwashed. For example, in the movie¬†Gaslight¬†(1944), a man manipulates¬†his wife to the point where she thinks she is losing her mind.

People who gaslight typically use the following techniques:

1. They tell blatant lies.

You know it’s an outright lie. Yet they are telling you this lie with a straight face. Why are they so blatant? Because they’re setting up a precedent. Once they tell you a huge lie, you’re not sure if anything they say is true. Keeping you unsteady and off-kilter is the goal.

2. They deny they ever said something, even though you have proof. 

You know they said they would do something; you know you heard it. But they out and out deny it. It makes you start questioning your reality‚ÄĒmaybe they never said that thing. And the more they do this, the more you question your reality and start accepting theirs.

3. They use what is near and dear to you as ammunition. 

They know how important your kids are to you, and they know how important your¬†identity¬†is to you. So those may¬†be one of the first things they attack. If you have kids, they tell you that you should not have had¬†those children. They will tell you’d be a worthy person if only you didn’t have a long list of negative traits. They attack the foundation of your being.

4. They wear you down over time.

This is one of the insidious things about gaslighting‚ÄĒit is done gradually, over time. A lie here, a lie there, a snide comment every so often…and then it starts ramping up.¬†Even the brightest, most self-aware people can be sucked into gaslighting‚ÄĒit is that effective. It’s the “frog in the frying pan” analogy: The heat is turned up slowly, so the frog never realizes what’s happening to¬†it.

5. Their actions do not match their words.

When dealing with a person or entity that gaslights, look at what they are doing rather than what they are saying. What they are saying means nothing; it is just talk. What they are doing is the issue.

6. They throw in positive reinforcement to confuse you. 

This person or entity that is¬†cutting¬†you down, telling you that you don’t have value, is now praising you for something you did. This adds an additional sense of uneasiness. You think, “Well maybe they aren’t so bad.” Yes, they are. This is a calculated attempt to keep you off-kilter‚ÄĒand again, to question your reality. Also look at what you were praised for; it¬†is probably something that served the gaslighter.

7. They know confusion weakens people. 

Gaslighters know that people like having a sense of stability and normalcy. Their goal is to uproot this and make you constantly question everything. And humans’ natural tendency is to¬†look to the person or entity that will help you feel more stable‚ÄĒand that happens to be the gaslighter.

8. They project.

They are a drug user or a cheater, yet they are constantly accusing you of that. This is done so often that you start trying to defend yourself, and are distracted from the gaslighter’s own behavior.

9. They try to align people against you.

Gaslighters are masters at manipulating and finding the people they know will stand by them no matter what‚ÄĒand they use these people against you. They will make comments such as, “This person¬†knows that you’re not right,” or “This person knows you’re useless too.” Keep in mind it does not mean that these people actually said these things. A¬†gaslighter is a constant¬†liar. When the gaslighter uses this tactic it¬†makes you feel like you don’t know who to trust or turn to‚ÄĒand that leads you right back to the gaslighter. And that’s exactly what they¬†want: Isolation gives them more control.

StockLite/Shutterstock
Source: StockLite/Shutterstock

10. They tell you or others that you are crazy.

This is one of the most effective tools of the gaslighter, because it’s dismissive. The gaslighter knows if they question your sanity,¬†people will not believe you when you tell them the gaslighter is abusive or out-of-control. It’s a master technique.

11. They tell you everyone else is a liar.

By telling you that everyone else (your family, the media) is a liar, it again makes you question your reality. You’ve never known someone with the audacity to do this, so they must be telling the truth, right? No. It’s a manipulation technique. It makes people turn¬†to the gaslighter for the “correct” information‚ÄĒwhich isn’t correct information at all.

The more you are aware of these techniques, the quicker¬†you can identify them and avoid falling¬†into the gaslighter’s trap.

PANDEMIC TV

pandemic tv

Pandemic TV, one thing that has gotten a lot of attention during this pandemic is TV. The ratings must be off the chain. I think I might have reached professional TV watcher status. As I explored my options, I noticed that there is one TV opportunity that I didn’t have that was being talked about, The Morning Show on Apple TV. So I decided to try the free one week for Apple TV. When I tried though, the condition was that I had to watch it on my Apple product, i.e. Mac, IPad, etc.. The problem was that I didn’t own one, at least not one that I could remember the password to. So I decided, in my Pandemaboredom, to buy an IPad, there were good deals all over and the deal that caught my eye was; buy an IPad, latest edition, cheaper than they were last year, more powerful and get a year of Apple TV free. I jumped all over the deal and set up my IPad and started to watch my free Apple TV. What I found out is that the Oscars, Grammy’s, Emmy’s, maybe Tony’s might be swept by Apple TV. Huh, I just EGOT, even though I think I put them in the wrong order. Anyway, Apple TV has the best mini series TV I have ever seen. I was thinking of buying a portable potty just so I could binge the shows, then I realized I just could take the¬† IPad to the bathroom (I didn’t do that, at least not to watch the TV shows). The shows See, Defending Jacob, Truth Be Told, For All Mankind and the movie The Banker, which was amazing, has left me knowing that there is no way that you aren’t left knowing that Apple TV just took entertainment to a new level. Can’t wait for Greyhound to come out and just want to see if they add some kind of Latino ethnic series, something like Showtime has done with City of Angels into the mix. I have a great idea about a Federal Law Enforcement Agent that dates an illegal Colombian woman and tries to keep it secret while doing his job. It’s interesting. LOL, ahhh, life is funny. It’s a comedy.

ABORTION

abortion

With the Supreme Court ruling that a Louisiana law is too burdensome to people seeking abortions, the question of abortion and the death of fetuses has come to the forefront. I have a couple of scenarios and/or questions that I just don’t understand. Do fathers have a say in an abortion and if they don’t why do male judges have a say? If a person hurts a woman that¬† is pregnant, less than 8 weeks, and creates a miscarriage, is that murder? If a woman that is driving to get an abortion and gets into an accident by a drunk driver and creates a miscarriage, did (s)he commit murder? If it is murder, if my girlfriend or wife drinks or smokes during her pregnancy, which could create harm to the fetus can I get a restraining order or an injunction so she would have to stop? And if she causes that fetus to abort because she accidentally eats something that created a miscarriage is that manslaughter? babyslaughter? fetusslaughter? If you believe in the death penalty, are you allowed not to believe in abortions? And if you believe abortions are legal, are you allowed to believe that the death penalty is illegal? I am sure there are so many more questions but those just a few off the top of my head. I’m pro-choice but would never get an abortion, mainly because I’m not a seahorse, if you get that joke, you’re pretty damn smart.

IN THE DAYS OF A PANDEMIC

pandemic

With the pandemic ravaging our community, every armchair economist has a plan that would be better than what the current plan is. Two trillion dollars seems to have made little progress in reviving the economy nor have the $1200 monthly checks being sent to homes. Some of the funnier ones were to use the money to buy everyone military grade gas masks or to use them for human bubbles. I can see someone on the shore being blown out to sea. Some others made sense. To freeze everything. No payments for anything and use the two trillion to pay grocery stores for food for people, obviously the grocery stores would have to show a receipt and allow shopping once a week with $100 max for a single person and increment by $40 per household member, and use the stimulus to pay utilities, capping how much the utility and cable companies could charge. You freeze mortgage, rent, car and other non essential payments and when this is all over, just restart them. Also freeze firing people or layoffs and freeze non essential businesses, like selling cars or whatever. Just completely halt everything non essential. This would also help with the quarantine and should help with saving money or using the full stimulus package prior to the pandemic being overcome. But that would have to be a plan that would have been in place already. Once this all over, maybe they can put a contingency plan in place, and be ready for SARS 3, the return of the Sith virus.

I will say, that if there was a national medical insurance, Bernie Sanders love baby, that card could be used as a debit card when buying groceries for the above mentioned solution. It would act as an “in case of national emergency” card. I know that the conspiracy theorists and these minute militia crazies would say it would be a way for the government to keep track of you and I would tell them that Darth Vader told me that the Guardians of the Galaxy wouldn’t allow it or Cinderella would get pissed off and beat up Snow White and take the dwarf’s AR-15’s while the tooth fairy takes all the teeth, not just the one under the pillow, in France. So we’re good.

Since the latest news that a re-emergence of the coronavirus may hit this winter, you would think that it is imperative to get a functional plan put in place to combat the health and economic outfall from its encore. The ability to suspend, or suspended animation, the country to withstand any potential pernicious outcome would seem the rational thought, yet no one has mentioned it. It would seem to be the smart thing to do is mediate any long term effects by just freezing everything. Only allow the necessary daily functions and make sure that no one loses a dime during the process, this is vital because when the country re-opens, their cabin fever will most likely have them go out and spend, and they have to money to spend, which would reboot the economy. The smart thing for the government to do for future pandemics is to have a fund set in place, in an account that garners interest on that money, so when a pandemic hits, they have those funds in reserve, the best place would be in the Social Security Administration, which already has those accounts in place.

DIVORCED W/ CHILDREN

divorce with children

The worst part about a divorce is how it affects the children. The effects can sometimes be minimal but can be seen sometimes in their grades as they start to dip, their behavior as they become more rebellious, their lack of closeness, their lack of caring and their lack of a path forward due to the parents not sharing the same plan or principles on how to guide their child.

Sometimes tough love is what is needed sometimes a lending ear but how would one know what the other is doing or what is needed if you are not there all the time?

PRAISE v. SHAME

shaming

In the era of the shaming culture, pointing out perceived flaws in people to have them conform to your views is incredibly dangerous. I read some of the news articles where famous people are shamed for different things that they do, these things, all of which the shamer is being petty and nit picky and am sure has done much worse, are relatively silly funny things. As I read these articles, I start to wonder why people try and shame someone? Is it because they are so devoid of a real life that the only way they can be happy is to try and belittle someone else? Or is it that they want to feel superior to someone that they truly want to be like? It could be that they were shamed all their lives and now they have found a way to let their frustrations out. While ironic that my thoughts seem to shame the shamers, I am actually looking for the root cause. One thing is for sure, shaming is a movement that has taken hold and won’t be going away any time soon.

In the old days, and not when I was a kid as my son would like to say “the old days when you had to dodge the dinosaurs” but when this country was in its infancy (I wasn’t around then either), people would create a village by building one house at a time. Everyone would come together and help build their neighbors house, then they would help build another house until all the neighbors had a home. This constructive team building, a term I’m sure you heard in your job, was something people aspired to. Neighbor always had a positive connotation and meant something good.

Now, in the days of social media, where you can be somewhat anonymous and don’t have to confront a person that you disagree with, people become emboldened and say things that they would not normally say. I’m sure that this was not the intention of social media when it was thought of but it is what it has become.

Psychology has taken a turn to using shaming as a technique to try and bring people into conformity and to teach humility. I believe that to be an ineffective method to teach a lesson and should only be used as a last resort, if at all. Praise used to be the preferred method to bring people together and to show unity in common beliefs, but those methods don’t seem to be relevant anymore or are not talked about or highlited the way they used to be.

The problem with shaming is that once you are done with one person, you are looking for the next person to shame and it becomes an addiction to humiliation. That’s disgusting, you’re sick, what a weirdo… blah, blah, blah. This ongoing and downward spiraling method of trying to bury people under your feet instead of picking people up on your shoulders seems to be contagious.

It used to be that if you didn’t like what someone did you expressed disappointment in private, had a conversation eye to eye, voiced you opinion, listened to theirs and then decided to either break off communication with the person (what people now a days call ghosting) or you would say that it was not important enough to end a friendship or relationship and forgive and forget.

Praising always seemed like a better method of communicating. Telling someone what they did right or what you found impressive about them to fortify that train of thought seemed to have a better result that would lead to better communities. I’m not saying that you can’t express disappointment when warranted, this isn’t Pleasantville, people do do stuff wrong, what I am saying is that shaming should be used sparingly and only in private.

While I understand that shaming is a type of psychological warfare used on battlegrounds, trying to shame, lets say a political figure, a congressman or congresswoman who have their constituents, is worthless and only seems like bullying. The people that voted for them and the people that will have a voice in their election are the only people that should have a say in their political ideology and that say will come in their next election. This also goes for regular people, famous people, basically all people. What good do you get from shaming someone, absolutely none. You get more from praising their good actions, as they will most likely repeat them.

Now, if you make money from shaming someone, if people are paying you to shame a person or group of people, then I can see…… that you are hard up for cash and should find a better job. In the end… In the end it is my solemn belief that God will judge you for you actions and telling him that shaming got you that brand new TV set with the Ultra High resolution that was 72 inches is not going to go over very well or that new white SUV even though you already have two cars, probably won’t work either.

This article is in response to the person at the gym that believes that shaming is how to shape politics. It wasn’t a great conversation.