What To Do When Your Child Faces A Bully


My son used have problems with bullies, most children do, even the bully themselves sometimes have their own tormentors and that’s why they torment. I’m not here to talk about about the psychology of the bullies, I’m here to tell you how I handled the situation.


I gave my son guidelines on how to act in case of an attack by a bully. I told him to follow some common sense reasoning that would make sure that he would not get in trouble. I said if it gets to be too much, just walk away, laugh like it’s funny and walk away. If the bully gets frustrated and tries or does hit you, and it doesn’t leave you in fear for your safety, walk away and tell a teacher. If the bully wants to fight you and you tried to walk away and he has thrown multiple shots at you, then you must defend yourself.


I taught my son how to box and to do push ups, sit ups and planks. I bought him a heavy bag, gloves and used my old focus mitts and taught him the basics of boxing. To my surprise, he packed quite wallop with his right hand, so I taught how to strengthen his left hand and how to throw a left hook. I taught punches by numbers, 1 through 12, starting with a stiff jab to the nose or eye (#1) and ending with a bolo punch or modified uppercut to the midsection with that powerful right of his (#12). The funny thing is that boxing took to him like a fish takes to the water. He was a natural. He has good coordination, he now invents his own combinations, he can start with a jab and move to the right and hook downstairs and then hook upstairs with his left. What this did was take his mind of the bullying, he had to focus on what he was doing, and it instilled a confidence that only being good at a sport can do. The other funny thing is, he doesn’t like boxing. He likes computer games.


The name calling is what bothered him. So I started to call him fat (he isn’t, he’s actually really thin) and making fat jokes and started to throw yo mama jokes at him. He would laugh and he would hit me right back with the different fat and yo mama jokes. Now when he gets teased, he has an arsenal of yo mama and fat jokes to rely on and more importantly, it doesn’t bother him anymore. He laughs but he takes them as jokes, like if it was me and him playing the dirty dozens. He doesn’t get bullied hardly at all now, since he has his own jokes and I taught him how to laugh at himself and not to take things so seriously. This is Step 3 but in a line of defense against bullies, this is his step 1. This is his go to solution. But if things do get out of control, then I’m sure he will know to walk away and if things do become violent, I hope that his boxing kicks in. While I don’t want that, I would rather he be prepared for the worst and only experience the best than not be prepared at all.


The reason my son started to get bullied in the first place, only the old man knows…..




Have you ever been told that you were a dumb dumb, a slow poke, or just plain stupid because you couldn’t figure out an answer to a question or riddle or you took an IQ test and didn’t do so well or maybe you were in the bottom half of your class when it came to grades? Well, I haven’t. I always did well when it came to academia. I usually was in the top of my class and I liked it. It made me feel good but was I intelligent, not necessarily. People decided to measure intelligence by how much education you have. The questions asked on an IQ test, while not seemingly difficult, sometimes requires a person to have a certain amount of education to deduce them. I recently took a Wonderlic test, a political pundit just said that all candidates for the Presidential office should take one prior to becoming President, and I did well (I’m not running for President). I scored a 45 but I argued with my computer for 12 minutes because one of the questions that it asked was misleading. The question, “which does not belong” the answers were A. Dentist B. Optometrist C. Orthodontist D. Dental Hygienist. I chose D. Dental Hygienist, the reason was because that was the only profession where you weren’t considered a doctor as all others are considered doctors but the answer was B. Optometrist because he was the only person that didn’t deal with teeth. I argued with my computer for those 12 minutes. I berated my computer and it, like a good puppy, didn’t say a thing back. I felt bad afterwards and I gave it hug and told him that both made sense. So I unofficially raised my score to a 46. Does that make me intelligent, maybe a little crazy, but not intelligent. Let me just say that I didn’t really argue with my computer, I just looked up all the professions to make sure I was right, and I so happened to be correct…. so I raised my score. With comedians getting there jokes brought up these days and used against them, I wanted to set the record straight. The reason I bring this topic up is because so much is being made of intelligence, in the realm of educational smarts, and other qualitative factors are being ignored.

I feel intelligence or the most intelligent person on the planet is the person, that throughout his and/or her life, smiled the most, enjoyed the most and sacrificed, in terms of having to do things that they don’t feel are right, the least to get there. That is my definition of the most intelligent person on the planet. While different things make us happy; some love academia while others love the beach, while others love being in love, the tool you use to measure this, quantatively, is the amount of time you spend smiling in your life and truly enjoying yourself or being happy without having to give away your moral beliefs of what is right and wrong. I, personally, was setting a record in this. I was doing well financially without having to give up my heart felt beliefs, dated some very interesting women, married maybe the most sought after woman, not because she was the most sought after but because of her truly amazing heart, and had a child that was the funniest and happiest kid that you might have ever seen in your life, i.e. at 4 years old I dropped a dish and broke it and he looks at me and shakes his head and says “what a douche” and at 8 years old he said that he was thinking of changing religions because the constitution allows freedom of religion and yom kippur or hannukah was around the corner and he heard that you get gifts every day for 10 straight days and change back when Christmas came around. I told him he can choose whatever religion he wanted but not for the gifts.

Unfortunately my tides turned and am now actively seeking my intelligence quotient again. The point being is that I went from being one of the smartest people in the world to being, maybe, the dumbest son of a bitch alive but I didn’t get any dumber education wise, in fact, I was going to school to finish up my degree, I just simply lost what made me happy or had it taken away, however you want to look at it, it’s not there anymore. Now, I’m not sad or depressed, luckily, what internal mechanisms that I was born with allow me to handle these situations and try to find a solution on how to regain the title as the smartest person in the world. The trek hasn’t been easy as obstacles have presented themselves along the way but I seemingly have a grasp on them for now.

In articles you read, you see politicians being challenged on there intelligence but how dumb can that person be if he/she is in the position that you want. I, for one, thought that I had a better chance of hitting the lottery on the same day that I challenged Lebron James to a game of one on one while I played in a wheelchair blindfolded and winning both at the exact same time then Donald Trump had of ever being elected President. So did half of the people, the ones that didn’t vote for him, which by coincidence are the same ones that challenge his IQ, so you can reasonably assume that when you challenge the smarts of a politician you obviously voted in the other direction, so how can you challenge him on his intelligence. The challenge will come, when at the end of his Presidency in either 2020 or 2024, he says it made him the happiest man alive or it didn’t. Most Presidents say that the best day of their lives are the day they enter office and the day they leave. Everything else in between is a test of who you are as a person. I, for one, didn’t vote for President Trump, but like I have written prior, I hope he proves to be the best President in our history and the person that succeeds him, is even better, why would you want anything else, if for nothing else, for yourself and your family. That would truly be an amazing trend, not unlike those amazing cat videos that everyone posts on twitter or snap chat. I think that too much emphasis is placed on raw human intellect and not enough on conceptaulizing the problem in front of you in different ways or, simply put, using common sense to reach a solution that some people tend to over think.

Albert Einstein, long considered the smartest man to walk on this planet wasn’t even the smartest man of his era, not according to his grades. His phenom or brilliance was presented in thinking outside the box and applying a different approach to a problem when a solution couldn’t be found. Oddly enough though, everyone said that he enjoyed life to the fullest. Maybe that’s why he’s the smartest man alive.

Another good example is if you ever heard of the story of the truck that got stuck under the bridge, engineers came over and were trying to figure out how to raise the bridge when a child came over and said that maybe you can let the air out of the tires. While that may be a fable, it is long considered a tale of how intelligence, when presented in a group of similar thinkers, can actually prevent you from getting the right answer. That’s why, in politics, I feel that having someone propose an opposite idea of what the group is considering, just to see what the outcome would be, is essential in getting the right answer, which would make everyone happier, right?

A person once told me, that due to my current situation, that 90% of the people were against me and that only 10% were for me. So after I did some calculating, inversing the the sine and cosine wave tangents and measuring for probabilities and unforeseen weather events and then adding a little magic, I found out that whatever makes that 90% dumber, or unhappy, will actually increase my IQ, or happiness, exponentially.


WTF Moment: Another one bites the dust

Another one bites the dust

An Oklahoma man was shot to death by bystanders after he opened fire on a restaurant with patrons inside. The man, who says that gay demons were taking over his mind, was obviously in despair and had no clue what was happening to him. Why he felt that his only recourse was to open fire on innocent people is still unknown. Maybe he felt that the gay demons were emanating from inside this particular establishment. In the process a minor and her mother were shot, not killed, luckily.

Two men, one who was already in the vicinity of the establishment but not inside and one who was driving by, happened to be there and armed. They shot the suspect andmurder god ultimately killed him and his demon thoughts. It’s sad that anyone got shot and also that these demons seem to press on to the next person. This rash of demon thoughts seem to take a toll on innocent people but obviously the demons survive. These active shooter scenarios, all who had demon thoughts of different kinds, seem to always appear out of nowhere and from people that were demon free until that point. So, we put another notch on the headboard of the murder gods as they have succeeded in taking another soul.

The father and husband of the injured family went up to the individuals after the police subdued all three and asked the most poignant question, “Which one of you is responsible for injuring my family?” Not really an easy question to answer.

Common Traits of Highly Intelligent People

10 Traits Of Highly Intelligent Individuals

Are you a night owl? The oldest sibling? Messy and disorganized? If so, you probably have a higher-than-average IQ.

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Intelligence is independent of socioeconomic status, race, and gender. Albert Einstein. Henrietta Swan Leavitt. Mozart—the world’s greatest minds have come from all walks of life.


But studies have shown that intelligent people do share certain personality traits. If you’ve always thought you were smarter than the average bear, you might find yourself identifying with some of these 10 characteristics.

1. Intelligent people stay up late.

Do you stay up all night or rise and shine with the sun? Some studies show that more intelligent children grow up to be nocturnal as adults.


There’s a neat bit of science behind this theory. Almost every living organism is governed by circadian rhythm, the internal clock that sets sleep/wake cycles. Humans, however, can actually alter their individual clock, which is why some people stay up late and others rise early.

Until fairly recently, humans tended to sleep as soon as the sun set and rise again with the light. The theory is that more intelligent individuals evolved to actually manipulate their sleep cycles, thus adapting more successfully to modern life.

*(Manny’s Personal thoughts – I’m wary about this one as it gives teenagers excuses to party ’til they drop and then say it made them smarter)

2. Birth order has an impact on intelligence.

Are you the oldest sibling in your family? If so, you might just be the smartest one too. Older siblings may be more intelligent because they receive more mental stimulation during critical stages of development.


If you weren’t lucky enough to be born first in your family, though, don’t despair. Research also shows that while older siblings may be more intelligent, younger siblings are actually more likely to be successful in life.

*Manny’s (middle child) Personal thought – This puts the middle child in a conundrum, as the youngest will be successful and oldest more intelligent, here’s crossing my fingers for the middle child hitting the lottery

3. Cat people are smarter.

Dogs may be man’s most loyal companions, but research claims that cat lovers may be more intelligent.


Carroll University conducted a study that measured personality traits, including intelligence among self-described cat lovers and dog lovers. The study found that dog lovers’ social skills are more advanced, but cat lovers scored higher on intelligence markers.

Owning a cat is probably not the sole reason for increased intelligence but a hallmark of your underlying personality. Dog owners tend to be extroverted and seek companionship.


Cat owners, on the other hand, are usually more introverted, which gives them ample time to focus on reading, thinking, and accumulating information.

*Manny’s Personal opnion – the author owns a cat and got bit by a dog. (maybe) Go dog power.

4. People with a high IQ are messy and disorganized.

Mom always told you to clean your room, but if your space looks like a Category 4 hurricane just swept through, it may be indicative of high IQ. According to a study from the University of Minnesota, a messy space spurs creative thought.


In the study, participants who were placed in a tidy space made traditionally “good” choices, like choosing an apple over chocolate.

But when asked to come up with new uses for ping pong balls, the messy-room participants overwhelming came up with creative and novel ideas.


The study suggests that tidy people make safer choices, but notoriously messy people (like Albert Einstein, for instance) tend to have creative thoughts that lead to innovation.

*Manny’s personal opinion – Thank god, I thought I was just lazy, it turns out I was just too damn smart to clean up

5. Breast-fed babies grow up to be more intelligent adults.

Breast milk is the original superfood. In the first months of life, it contains all the key nutrients babies need to thrive. However, synthetic formula also contains many nutrients and is a great alternative to breast milk. So what makes breast-fed babies smarter?


According to Betty Vohr, a professor at Brown University, “The benefit is likely due to long-chain fatty acids found in breast milk.” Long-chain fatty acids, like DHA, aid infants in association and memory development, which may help them develop a higher IQ.

If you bottle feed, there’s no need to worry. Just make sure your formula includes DHA, and your little one will probably be at the top of their class in a few years.

*Manny’s Personal opinion – Don’t know if I was breast fed, but I sure tried later on in life

6. More intelligent people engage in one-sided conversation.

Benedict Cumberbatch’s Sherlock Holmes often carries on a conversation with himself, talking almost as fast as he solves cases. Sherlock, a brilliant (but fictional) detective, may be onto something. Studies show that talking to yourself could be a sign of advanced intelligence.


Problem-solving out loud can help organize thoughts and actions. In addition, talking to yourself can help you focus and complete specific tasks faster. So the next time you get shushed in the library for muttering to yourself, let the librarian know you’re just trying to improve your brainpower!

  • Manny’s Personal Opinion – And society was locking these people up in mental hospitals, no wonder shit is fucked up, all the intelligent people are in rubber rooms

7. Curiosity leads to higher intelligence.

There are three markers that determine a person’s ability to mentally manage complexity.


Intelligence quotient (IQ) is traditionally thought of as the most important indicator of intelligence and is difficult to improve significantly as you age.

The other two indicators, emotional quotient (EQ) and curiosity quotient (CQ), however, can be improved over time and may play a much larger role in the ability to improve cognitive function.


In particular, individuals with a higher CQ are more accepting of the unknown, preferring to ask questions and form their own hypotheses. Individuals who cultivate a higher CQ tend to have a higher intellectual investment over time, leading to increased intelligence.

*Manny’s Personal Opinion – That’s odd that curiosity marks intelligence because it killed the cat that “supposedly” smart people have and the dog survived, who’s the smart pet owner now

8. Playing an instrument makes you smarter.

Now might be the time to call up your kindergarten teacher and thank them for making you learn “Hot Cross Buns” on the recorder.


Studies show that children who play an instrument “develop ‘neurophysiological distinction’ between certain sounds that can aid in literacy, which can translate into improved academic results for kids.”

Some scientists disagree, instead positing that children who take music lessons “tend to have better-educated, higher-earning parents, and to do more extra-curricular activities than other children their age.”


Whether or not playing an instrument actually improves brain function, all scientists can agree that encouraging children to participate in arts programs is never a bad thing. Kids who interact with the arts tend to have a broader worldview, which also increases intelligence.

*Manny’s Personal Opinion -I play spotify all the time

9. A sense of humor indicates intelligence.

If you’ve ever seen the classic comedy Dumb and Dumber, you might disagree with the theory that a sense of humor indicates above-average intelligence. In one study, students were asked to come up with captions for New Yorker cartoons. The captions that students found funniest were overwhelmingly written by those who performed higher on IQ tests.


People who are considered to have a high IQ don’t find just anything humorous, however. According to Reader’s Digest, people who appreciate dark jokes are more intelligent. One reason for this is that it takes a greater mental capacity to process a dark or complicated joke as opposed to the simplicity of a knock-knock joke.

*Manny’s Personal Opinion – Well, I guess you have to read my other personal opinions and make an intelligent decision, by the way, if you don’t get it, they were too dark for you

10. Intelligent people are more humble.

Everyone knows one person at work who brags about being the best when their performance is really mediocre on a good day.


The Dunning-Kruger Effect explains how this happens.

Basically, the Dunning-Kruger Effect is a cognitive bias whereby incompetent people (like that coworker) can’t recognize their own incompetence, and what’s more, they tend to believe the opposite about themselves.

*Manny’s Personal Opinion – I just don’t know what to say here, they could be right


On the flip side, people who are highly skilled and considered to be more intelligent rarely brag about their accomplishments and are more likely to doubt their abilities.



In the age of the #metoo movement, the word consent has come to the forefront of the conversation or should be addressed so there is no mistakes. Before I start pondering on that I am going to look back at my own time and see if there might be a place and time where I feel that maybe I made a wrong decision.

The first girl that I ever dated, if you want to call it that, was a young woman that I met in Antioch. Desiree, I think that was her name, was 14 and I was 15. Her biggest complaint at the time was that I didn’t move fast enough, we saw each other a handful of times and I was a gawky teenager who never dated before. I heard all the stories from my friends about how experienced they were and all the women that they have had sex with and then they will look at me and ask how many have you been with and I would just reply, I’m still a virgin. A lot of laughter would incur. That would hold true until I turned 17 and so would the fact that I believed my friends about there conquests, who were most likely lying. So with my hands sweaty and my heart beating out of my shirt, I kissed her, a regular lip on lip kiss. Desiree, from the hollow region of East Main street, Paterson, was not having it. It was awkward because her mouth was a little open and I was inexperienced, definitely not suave. We would see each other, maybe one more time but that would be all. It wasn’t until I met Janina, also in Antioch, that I would learn a little more. We dated for three years. I met her when she was 15 and I was 16. Those three years saw us break up and get back together at least 7 or 8 times. It was an amazing experience and I, like all teenagers at that age, thought that this was the woman I was going to marry. Janina was strong willed, intelligent, beautiful (a word that I will repeat a lot) and the type that if you told her she couldn’t do it, she would prove you wrong. Our first kiss was awkward because, like Desiree, she thought I wasn’t taking the initiative. There is no rule book on how to recognize when a woman likes you, you go by gut feeling, and depending on the gut or who possesses it, it might get you into trouble. Luckily, being an awkward looking nerdy person growing up, my gut always hinted towards make sure you’re not making a fool of yourself. So, Janina did what any woman would do, she kissed me and I found out why the French got the reputation of lovers, the french kiss. Our faces locked more like a car accident then what you see in the movies but after a few seconds I got the hang of it and it was amazing. I was glad then, not so much when she broke up with me permanently, but I am glad now that we met. We basically learned everything together, about the birds and bees (trying to keep it PG for her) and she was the perfect person to go through that adventure with. Janina gave me the confidence to be myself around the fairer sex. We joined the military together and our relationship ended. We had our ups and downs, our breaks and our make-ups. In one of our breaks, I think it was a break, I met Betty at a friend’s house. Me and Betty would eventually make our way to an empty room and do what teenagers do, we made out, when things started to become hot and heavy, I asked her if she was drunk. She said yeah and I told her that I couldn’t do anything beyond the make out session. You see I was sober and I didn’t feel right about it. While me and Betty would eventually start up a more physical relationship, it was important to me that we both be in the same state of mind. We both got drunk. That was my first endeavor into the #metoo situation. I would go on to have 37 sexual encounters between the ages of 17 and 35. While that seems like a big number to some, it might seem like a small number to others. But if I put like this, I slept with two women a year during my single years, the average being three, then it doesn’t seem big at all, it seems quite lame. All 37 women, I made sure, knew what was going on and consented. That doesn’t mean that some of the women I was interested in didn’t say no, some did and none of those women are part of the 37. Some apologized. One woman even showed me that she wanted too but that she had a fiance. I didn’t understand why she did that. I told her that she didn’t have to explain her no, that no was enough and that I thought it was ok to say no. I asked her why she felt the need to explain her no and she said that guys get angry when you say no. I remember feeling bad for her and told her, you don’t ever have to explain.

Would a man have to explain if they said no to a woman. So I thought about all the times I said no, 58 times, not all of them were easy to say no to (I mean a stripper never hit on me in my life and she had to pick a time when my wife, then girlfriend, was 6 months pregnant) luckily my friend was kind enough to take the bullet for me or at least he tried (the reason we were in  a strip club, is because I asked her, my wife, then girlfriend, first if it was ok, she was amazing and secure like that). Some came with an explanation (mostly that my wife, then girlfriend, was pregnant, 14 times in a span of 6 months, hottest streak I ever had, it must have been the pheromones of an expecting daddy), some didn’t. None of the women got angry though, maybe a little embarrassed, but none threatened me or pouted or called me names or try to shame me. None were my boss or did they have anything to do with anything concerning my immediate future. Some of the women would get a little handsy and footsy. But it didn’t bother me nor am I complaining about it, I actually thought of it as a compliment. It didn’t bother me because I was 5’11”, 185 to 195 pounds, knew how to defend myself and wasn’t intimidated by the 120 pounders. Probably could take them out if they tried anything, actually, it didn’t even cross my mind. That’s because guys don’t see women as a threat, not that way. Since none had any control over my destiny, to be a retired blogger, I just brushed it aside. Is it a double standard, I don’t know, it doesn’t happen at all now. I’m older and my forehead has become a five head thanks to lack of testosterone and a receding hairline. I guess if the woman was 6’5″ and was more muscular than me, I would be concerned, but if that happens, I would be more interested in her freakish genetics than being scared. Plus I boxed someone 6’4″, 240 pounds before, and gave as good as I got, for the first couple of minutes. Then you learn it only hurts when you stop not when you get hit. So is it a double standard, I don’t know how women are going to feel about my answer but I don’t feel that way, mainly because I can defend myself and, luckily, never had a situation where the threat of violence for sex was an issue. I have though, been intimidated, not by a woman and not with bodily harm. It didn’t feel good. The answer was a resounding no, especially after the intimidation factor but since all I had to lose was this blog at the time, I didn’t care. That just made me more resolute in handling the matter.

So when you do have something to lose, your job, your career, your livelihood maybe even the chance of criminal charges, how does one handle that? These people, these Consent 1predators, that use fear as a tactic to try and control you and do what they want and do what they say, these people that are sexually aroused by instilling fear in their prey, oddly enough, I couldn’t find a psychological term for it, are more common than we like to admit, that’s why I find it odd that there isn’t a psychological term for it. Harvey Weinstein comes to mind. His actions have severely complicated many lives and there many out there like him. So how do we know? With all that’s going on, how do we know when consent is given?

Does it have to be given orally outright or can we decipher if it is implied? I have leaned for a kiss by reading the wrong signals and had my attempts rejected. I didn’t take it personally, I just realized that maybe I was misreading the situation. Am I know in violation of the #metoo guidelines? A woman once said I could lay down next to her, said that it was alright that I put my arm around her, laughed at my silly jokes and when she turned towards me, I kissed her on her lips, she reacted harshly and told me to get out of the bed. I apologized and left and slept on the couch, 5 minutes later she said I could come back, I said no because I couldn’t understand her or the situation. Did she just want a hug? Did I overstep my boundaries? Was I wrong? Didn’t grab her anywhere or rub anything but she seemed like she didn’t know what she wanted and here I am putting the situation on her. I thought she turned to kiss while she turned, obviously, for other reasons. I apologized several times but decided not to return for the encore when she said I could return back to the bed. Now, I don’t go kissing complete strangers while they reporting or even women that I go out on a date (unless I ask and they agree and usually tequilla is leading the charge on those days), but I tend to try to not be as shy as I was once as a teenager when they say that you can lay down next to them in bed and let you put your arm around them and you snuggle but sometimes that is all that they want, so you have to either take it or leave it.

If relationships lose spontaneity then it kinda loses it’s romantic feature. That’s just my opinion and by no means a reason or an excuse to go for it if you are not sure or not take no for an answer. That would be the only time that something like that happened to me. I have had women lean in and kiss me and had to turn them down, would they be in violation of the #metoo guidelines? I didn’t think so, still don’t. Again, I took it as a compliment and it was usually because I was in another relationship and, maybe more importantly, there was no threat involved.

I am by no means the reincarnation of Jesus of Nazareth, if you believe in that, but no one is. I do though, tend to err on the side of caution when it comes to matters of the heart and the flesh.




15 Cool Facts about Breastfeeding

breast feeding

We all know the saying “breast is best” but here are some of the colossal benefits, and a couple quirky facts, about breastfeeding. 1.  Human milk boosts a baby’s immune system big time—helping baby fight viral, bacterial, and parasitic infections, including:

  • Respiratory tract infections
  • Ear infections
  • Bacterial meningitis
  • Pneumonia
  • Urinary tract infections
  • Infant diarrhea
  • Common colds and flus

2.  Breastfeeding can actually reduce baby’s risk of disease later in life, including:

  • Type I and II diabetes
  • Hodgkin’s disease
  • Leukemia
  • Obesity
  • High blood pressure
  • High cholesterol levels
  • Crohn’s disease
  • Ulcerative colitis
  • Asthma
  • Eczema

3.  Breastfeeding reduces mama’s risk of ovarian and breast cancer, heart disease, and osteoporosis.  The longer she breastfeeds, the higher the benefit.

Get this—breastfeeding a baby girl actually reduces her lifetime risk of breast cancer by 25%.

4.  Breastfeeding saves a family approximately $2 to 4 thousand dollars annually (compared to cost of formula).

5.  Breastfeeding helps mama heal faster in the postpartum, helping her uterus return to pre-pregnancy size faster and lowering overall postpartum blood loss.

6.  Breastfeeding can help mama return to her pre-baby weight.  It takes 1000 calories a day on average to produce breast milk.  Women are advised to consume an extra 500 calories a day, and the body dips into reserves it built up in pregnancy to make the rest (it’s important to consume those extra calories or the body actually goes into “starvation mode” and holds onto the reserves).

7.  Producing breast milk consumes 25% of the body’s energy; the brain only uses 20% by comparison.

8.  On average, babies remove 67% of the milk mama has available—they eat until fullness, not until the breast is emptied.

9.  Almost 75% of all moms produce more milk in their right breast, whether they are right- or left- handed.

10.  Mama’s body is constantly making the perfect milk for baby.  Milk changes its nutritional profile as baby grows (milk made for a 3 month old is different than for a 9 month old).  Milk can even change day to day—for example, water content may increase during times of hot weather and baby-sickness to provide extra hydration.

11.  Human milk contains substances that promote sleep and calmness in babies (who doesn’t love that?)  Breastfeeding also calms mama and helps her bond to baby.

12.  Breastfed infants are at lower risk for sudden infant death syndrome (SIDS)

13.  Mama’s breasts can detect even a one degree fluctuation in baby’s body temperature and adjust accordingly to heat up or cool down baby as needed.  This is one reason skin-to-skin contact in the early days is so crucial.

14.  Breastfeeding reduces baby’s risk of cavities later on and may lower the chance they will need braces as kids.

15.  Breastfeeding mamas sleep on average 45 minutes more a night, compared to those who formula feed.

By Amy Johnson-Grass written for Healthy Foundations Birth Center

When are Accidents not Accidents

Car Accidents

I have seen some horrific accidents in my time. They have claimed life’s of people and their loved ones. I have been in a couple but have been lucky enough to escape without any serious injury. The CDC has the following on mortality rates:

Number of deaths for leading causes of death:

  • Heart disease: 633,842
  • Cancer: 595,930
  • Chronic lower respiratory diseases: 155,041
  • Accidents (unintentional injuries): 146,571
  • Stroke (cerebrovascular diseases): 140,323
  • Alzheimer’s disease: 110,561
  • Diabetes: 79,535
  • Influenza and Pneumonia: 57,062
  • Nephritis, nephrotic syndrome and nephrosis: 49,959
  • Intentional self-harm (suicide): 44,193

As you can see, accidents is number 4 in a list that is filled with natural causes and the last one is for people that have bad dreams or whom I refer to as the murder god. I ask myself if there was anything that could have been done to prevent these deaths. They’re unintentional, seemingly. These stats are yearly, making the total deaths from the above incidents at, where’s my calculator, 2,013,017 deaths per year. Of those roughly 190,700 were preventable or 9% of the deaths yearly. What can we do to prevent some of these deaths, well, for the natural causes, eat right, exercise routinely, at least 20 to 30 minutes 3 or 4 times weekly. That means you have to actually sweat, not pour water over your head or walk in the rain, even though I used to love jogging in the rain on a nice summer day. Stop smoking and using illicit drugs, fall and stay in love, actually proven to help your heart, laugh a lot, even (especially) at yourself, don’t take life too seriously, especially politics, don’t fret over money or things you don’t have control over and watch a comedy.

As for the accidents, check to make sure you tires are safe. That has been my biggest problem over the last couple of years. For some reason my tires have come off while I was driving (almost, one lug nut was left and on it’s last thread) and I had a blowout while driving, luckily my family wasn’t in the car. I have been in a couple of accidents but I have been lucky enough to walk away even though my air bag seems to have failed to go off in 3 of them. I had a close head to head call around a bend with a dump truck, I’m going to thank my boxing training and quick reflexes. Don’t drink while driving you may spill your drink and don’t drive tired, particularly on shitty tires. Drive slow on snowy roads, or you’ll miss everyone spinning out when they think that their car is the car that can drive on snow like on a regular day and be a considerate and attentive driver meaning, don’t be that guy, you know, the guy that sees a person that wants to come into your lane before they get stuck on the exit lane and you purposely stay right next to him so you can frustrate the person and then watch him give you the finger. Don’t tailgateticket because road rage is real and some people are nuts. If you are late to your appointment, don’t try to make up time by playing frogger or pole position with your car, you don’t have three lives. Don’t take a zero tolerance on us idiots that drive badly, show some charity and let us go ahead of you because you will almost be sure to pass us up a mile down the road arguing with a cop about everyone else speeding and why are you giving me a ticket. And most of all, be happy, because you don’t make any money not being happy and it feels so much better to be happy.

Some other good hints are yellow means proceed with caution, not free hamburgers if you make it across and Stop, while self explanatory, people tend to see it only as a recommendation. Here’s a story I like to share, I was driving with my girlfriend and I ran a red light, she said you just ran a red light, I said don’t worry, my brother does it all the time, I ran another red light and she said you just ran another red light, I said again, don’t worry my brother does it all the time, I stopped at a green light and she said, what are you doing, it’s green, I said, I’m just making sure my brother isn’t coming the other way. Hopefully I made you laugh and added an hour to your life.