WTF: AURORA, IL(L)

aurora

5 People dead, 5 officers hurt, 1 seemingly FINE person goes on a rampage. No prior history of such actions. More sacrifices to the Murder Gods. I don’t know if it’s the Nyquil or just that I’m sort of numb to this already. Vroom Vroom go the RPM’s.

murder god

I THANK GOD FOR BOXING

boxing gloves

I would like to share a story of why everyone should do boxing.

I have trained in boxing, on and off, for the past thirty odd years. Have never been good enough to really do anything with it financially speaking, but it has kept me in good shape. When I severely sprained my ankle while working in the border Patrol, I stood on one leg and and a leg with an air cast and used boxing drills to keep me in shape. As soon as I was cleared to run again, something that I used to love to do, I was able to run down a group of illegal citizens that had crossed. Chasing them down for a little less than a mile, carrying all my equipment , the day after I was cleared to return to work. Boxing is an amazing sport that fine tunes your body. What it does mostly, it refines your reflexes. It makes them quicker and steady.

This was never more apparent when my son, at the age of 8, for some reason decided to cross the street running while an SUV had just accelerated at full speed to beat a light. I had just turned my head to the right to look for oncoming traffic when I caught my son, who was to my left, through the corner of my eye, racing into the middle of the street. Out of nowhere, my left hand, my best hand, I used to throw a mean and quick left hook, even though I’m righty, reached out and grabbed him and pulled him back. The SUV was literally, not figuratively, right upon him. I pulled him back and out of the way. All I can think is that if my son gotten hit that day, I would have never been able to live with myself. It would have devastated me. My son apologized and he knew better. I have been teaching him to the cross the street since he was 5. I don’t know what got into his head, ear or eye.

I thank boxing, it literally saved my son’s life.

WTF!

Waves up the nose

Those aren’t the only waves that go up the nose. The old lady can’t take no for an answer. Straight you old biddie. Born that way. I don’t cast assertions as to your preference, whatever makes you happy. Unless if what makes you guys happy is me, then find that happiness elsewhere. And good luck. Not being able take no for an answer is a serious flaw in your genetic make-up. See you in court crazies.

It’s not only the nose, it can be the hair, feet, thumbs and pinkies, electrical boogaloo. The tricks are plentiful. And it’s not only guys that they do this to, women … children. Crazy.

That question that lingers is why would you want to keep these methods such a secret?

WTF!

kevin hart

Kevin Hart Slammed for His Response to Homophobic Attack on Jussie Smollett

So funny. The only person that has the right to dismiss Kevin Hart’s tweets is the person he referenced. All these people that jump on this band wagon of trying to tear the comedian down for some jokes, albeit comedians will make some on edge comments and they were only jokes, must be perfect. Didn’t know that their were so many Jesus’s walking the earth. Hey, to those people, I would like start my own wine distillery, maybe you can come over and turn my water to wine. I would share the profits with you but I’m sure you’re too perfect for that. Mr. Hart, keep your head up, if any of us were perfect, then we wouldn’t need mirrors in our homes or cars in our garages. We would just wake up and float every where. You see, after reading this paragraph, this is why we need the Kevin Hart’s of the world, I’m just not funny but we all need to laugh. I’m not calling people out for chastising him on the statement, I’m calling them out for mentioning it more than once. He apologized, he got it, let’s move on.

WTF: THE WALL

pink floyd

Why are you building the wall? To keep the crazies in or out, because it seems that the crazies have been here for a while and none are illegal. This is the only wall I’m interested in. Rock out with your pants undone. Keeping it PG. Tick tock, people are hungry, about to file for bankruptcy. No money for gas to get to work. LOL, I’ll build them damn wall, if you don’t mind Legos. A Lego wall, now that might work. No pressure though. I’m sure we’ll get to the right answer quickly.

So, the wall is just a 214 mile extension. And it’s going to cost 5.7 billion. Well, I would like to sell my tools to you cheap. $150,000 and only broken once.

I have an idea, why don’t we build a labyrinth at the border. A really tricky one and if they make it through they automatically qualify for LAPR status. We’ll put it on TV and sell advertisement to afford the labyrinth, it will actually produce a profit.

This is becoming dangerously close to the hunger games for federal workers. And no offense meant to any leader of this country but we should try not to liken something that’s meant to divide property to a person that tried remove boundaries.

WTF: ANGRY THUMB GYM

thumbs eyes

I don’t what it is but every time I go to the gym, my thumbs and eyes feel electric. My wrists and elbows and forearms and biceps hurt. And a feeling of high irritation comes over me. It’s generally at the gym. Maybe I’m doing something wrong because everyone else except for a few are playing on their phones but they don’t seem to have that electric irritation.